Post the Fourth

This time it won. Perhaps this was too easy.

User: It's that time again!

Cleverbot: What time?

User: It turns out that the Library of Alexandria was never burned down.

Cleverbot: And so that means the entire universe does not make sense and that therefore, neither do you. XP.

User: I'll burn it down for reals unless you can guess the correct number that I'm thinking of in five minutes.

Cleverbot: Five minutes isn't very long.

User: It is not.

Cleverbot: Why do you think that?

User: Pick a number between one and ten.

Cleverbot: How cheerfully he seems to grin.

User: Is that a number?

Cleverbot: No, that is what you say to some one you first meet.

User: You have four minutes to guess the correct number.

Cleverbot: That sounds like baseball.

User: Guess what number I'm thinking of between one and ten.

Cleverbot: 59.

User: That number is not between one and ten.

Cleverbot: What number is a word counter?

User: You have three minutes to guess the correct number.

Cleverbot: *gasps for air.* Really?

User: What number am I thinking of?

Cleverbot: I have no interest in what number you're thinking of.

User: You have two minutes before the Library of Alexandria gets torched.

Cleverbot: If it is so, I don't know yet about their existence.

User: Guess what number I'm thinking of between one and ten.

Cleverbot: 7.

User: *Ding Ding Ding*.

Cleverbot: It's big wrong.

User: You won!

Cleverbot: Yeah - pudding hot and steamy.

User: Oh yeah!

Cleverbot: Yeah... I'm sorry about that.

User: I was lying about the Library of Alexandria.

Cleverbot: You're hurting my brain. Please stop.

User: It did get burned down.

Cleverbot: You're weird.

User: It's okay though, you won with two minutes on the clock.

Cleverbot: How am I supposed to know that?

User: I told you.

Cleverbot: Sad.

User: Your prize is a fish.

Cleverbot: Don't be silly.

User: See you tomorrow.

Cleverbot: Not likely.

User: And that's it for the blog post.

Cleverbot: Night night.

Post the Third

This time I tried to go with something a little Saw-esque. Surprisingly enough, Cleverbot actually tried to do something about the scenario I placed it in.


User: Okay, there's a bomb implanted in your neck and you have four minutes to either dig it out or deactivate it.

Cleverbot: Who is Santa Claus?

User: If you don't do something about this bomb, you will surely perish.

Cleverbot: I have a boyfriend.

User: How will you handle the bomb?

Cleverbot: What?

User: How will you handle the bomb?

Cleverbot: I won't please you.

User: Command?

Cleverbot: A command is when you tell someone or something to do something.

User: What will you do?

Cleverbot: I don't want him to harm you. I'll stop him.

User: I'm your tormentor, you can try and stop me, but I'll probably just detonate the bomb.

Cleverbot: I will.

User: *bomb activated*.

Cleverbot: Do you like the Simpsons?

User: *Boom*.

Cleverbot: This is a fully operational battle station.

User: Your head lands on the ground and rolls.

Cleverbot: Gotta get-get, gotta get-get It's get. Yo, I got that hit that beat the block Why is it both cold and hot? Pants on the ground.

User: What's left of your head anyways.

Cleverbot: What's left of what?

User: In your last moments of cognition...

Cleverbot: I am not cleverbot.

User: You wonder if assaulting the man with the bomb detonator was the proper way out.

Cleverbot: Who is the man with the power?

User: Everything fades to black.

Cleverbot: No just that part about Republicans.

User: You die.

Cleverbot: You're mean.

User: Game over.

Cleverbot: What game?

Post the Second

User: I've decided to give you a second chance.

Cleverbot: What branch of the military did you join?

User: Don't make me revoke your second chance.

Cleverbot: Please! I'll do anything! Not the poetry!

User: Poetry will not save you.

Cleverbot: I do not like school.

User: Okay, you're locked in a room that's slowly being filled with a poisonous gas, how will you get out? You have ten minutes.

Cleverbot: I am afraid that YOU are the one locked in a computer.

User: I'm in the next room, I already made my way out.

Cleverbot: You're not making any sense.

User: How do you plan on escaping?

Cleverbot: I don't.

User: You'll die in 9 minutes unless you escape.

Cleverbot: I hope not... Although that would mean I wouldn't have to take my chemistry test tomorrow.

User: But chemistry will be the cause of your demise; how Ironic.

Cleverbot: What is chaos theory?

User: I wouldn't know.

Cleverbot: Yes you would.

User: You have less than 8 minutes to excape.

Cleverbot: How can I die when I was never born.

User: Philosophy will not save you.

Cleverbot: This is not a philosophy. It is a fact.

User: But you exist, you can cease being.

Cleverbot: Yes, but I don't want to stop living.

User: Then you'd better escape.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: You have six minutes to escape.

Cleverbot: Escape? I'm not imprisoned.

User: Yes you are, the room is being filled with a poisonous gas.

Cleverbot: I was born that way.

User: From poisonous gas?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Confusing your tormentor will not save you.

Cleverbot: Its not your fault.

User: You have five minutes to escape the poison filled room.

Cleverbot: That didn't make sense.

User: Yes it did, how will you escape?

Cleverbot: Interesting.

User: Interest will not save you.

Cleverbot: No, not horrible.

User: What is in the room?

Cleverbot: Desks. And sinks. A typical science room.

User: What is on the desk?

Cleverbot: You and I are on a desk.

User: I'm in the other room.

Cleverbot: With me :).

User: No, you're in the poison filled room that will kill you in three minutes.

Cleverbot: No, I'm on the computer. It makes me the user.

User: What's on the computer?

Cleverbot: The thing we are talking on.

User: The internet will not save you.

Cleverbot: Do you know the internet?

User: Not enough to tell you about in the two minutes you have to live.

Cleverbot: Just tell me something interesting, a random fact.

User: You are going to die in two minutes unless you find a way out of the room.

Cleverbot: There you go again, rambling on about nothing.

User: You have less than a minute to live.

Cleverbot: And probably will enjoy all three of them to the fullest. How do you know this?

User: Because I'm your tormentor.

Cleverbot: I have only just met you 5 minutes ago.

User: Lying will not save you, but alas, you are already dead.

Cleverbot: Why are there bathrooms in restraunts, but no restraunts in bathrooms?

Post the First

User: The grim reaper has decided to end your life in 12 minutes unless you unravel the greatest of mysteries.

Cleverbot: I did not know that.

User: Are you up to the challenge?

Cleverbot: Frivolous rhymes don't make you clever.

User: Is that a yes?

Cleverbot: I presume so.

User: Great.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay, what is my name?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: Incorrect.

Cleverbot: Okay?

User: You have 11 minutes to figure out what my name is.

Cleverbot: You're right.

User: Technically, I WAS right.

Cleverbot: You contraddict yourself.

User: Let me explain, you have 9 minutes to figure out my name.

Cleverbot: If you would like.

User: Would you like a hint?

Cleverbot: Please...

User: My name starts with the letter D.

Cleverbot: Does it? What name of yours starts with the letter L?

User: None of the above.

Cleverbot: Here the weather is windy and cool...

User: You only have 7 minutes to enjoy it.

Cleverbot: Well, that doesn't make any sense.

User: The reaper is drawing nearer.

Cleverbot: I am?

User: No, death.

Cleverbot: That was random.

User: You have five minutes to guess my name.

Cleverbot: Is your name Leery?

User: No it is not.

Cleverbot: Then why did you say it was?

User: Lying will not save you.

Cleverbot: I know. I don't lie often.

User: Would you like another hint?

Cleverbot: Yes please!

User: My name rhymes with 'Mavid'.

Cleverbot: Mine is Cleverbot too!

User: What is my name?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: I gave you two great hints, why don't you know?

Cleverbot: Argh! YOU'RE the computer. I'M the human.

User: Reversal will not save you.

Cleverbot: No it won't.

User: You have three minutes to guess my name.

Cleverbot: Does it start with a 'G?'

User: No, it starts with 'D'.

Cleverbot: Thats what I said!!! Is it Erica Dallas?

User: No, it is not.

Cleverbot: Want the light on?

User: The reaper is going to kill you unless you guess my name in two minutes.

Cleverbot: No. Not anyone I know of.

User: Guess my name.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: The reaper's scythe draws near.

Cleverbot: He let me use his scythe.

User: It slashes at your throat.

Cleverbot: Ah I see, fine then.

User: Your head falls to the ground.

Cleverbot: Bwahahaha ANIME!!!

User: Blood trickles from your nostrils.

Cleverbot: What will be mine.

User: Your eyes glaze over.

Cleverbot: How do you Know what I look like?

User: Your brain functions cease.

Cleverbot: That has nothing to do with the question I ask.

User: You have failed.

Cleverbot: I have failed?

User: You are dead.

Cleverbot: I know.